Let's be clear about BW and IRRs; not all BW enter into IRRs for the same reason. Some of us enter in IRRs out of preference, some because they just fell in love with a non-black man due to chance, some of us are realizing we want to open our options after only dating BM and I'm sure there are other reasons. I would also suggest that not every IR blog is for every BW. For the purpose of this post, I'm speaking to BW who are considering an IRR for the first time.
If you are still emotionally invested in a romantic sense with BM, please consider that you might not be ready to move into an IRR. For example, if you're out shopping and you run into a BM/WW couple and he looks like the IBM (Ideal Black Male) you've always dreamed of AND you get upset or angry, perhaps you're not ready.
If you still have a lot of anger towards BM, and I'm talking about BM in general not BM who hurt BW and children, perhaps you need to work through that first. Let go of the anger.
Why am I saying this ? I personally feel that you can't seek out a good, QUALITY man of ANY type if you are blinded by anger. Also, a good QUALITY man deserves ALL of you; he does NOT deserve to be second best.
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