I found Evia and Halima's blogs by way of the now infamous AP news article about the depressing numbers of single black women seeking to "date out" as an option to marriage...the "Something New" movement. As I read that AP article, I recognized my experience and those of my black women friends, acquaintances and even some family members. I knew from jump street when I started reading Evia & Halima that they were not going to "speak" to every black woman. I often found it puzzling why those women who did not have the experiences that Evia & Halima spoke of, just didn't move on to other blogs that would speak to their experiences with IR relationships, black men and the black community. The endless "trolls" and arguments were so tiresome. I think it has been stated that Evia turned off the comments on her original blog that is now the E-zine.
Then along came Evia's Gen II, a private subscription only blog. I decided to address my feelings on this subject and then never speak of it again because of my Gen II experience. So much has been said or inferred about the reason Gen II was formed and what went on there. I have to say much of what has been said, based on my own experience as a subscriber, is so wrong. Apart from regular commenters, other subscribers would have no idea who was a member, therefore, I don't "know" all the people who joined. But what I do know is that all members, silent or vocal, eventually became a community.
That's right, we had a small community of black women and some men. I'm writing this today because I want it known that there are some AMAZING women in the Gen II community. We are wonderful, smart, enterprising, good-hearted and just, again, the ladies of Gen II are amazing women. We are not mindless sheep who worship at the altar of any human being. I think what some people don't understand is that by creating Gen II, Evia gave us a place where we could have our own space, free of trolls and others who did not like what she or Halima had to offer to those of us who SOUGHT OUT what they had to say and what we could learn from other women on the blog. People were WILLING to pay for that privilege. For anyone who doesn't know, the Gen II ladies encouraged Evia to share some of the full articles from the paid blog on the Ezine and Evia was glad to do so. We are FREE BLACK WOMEN with minds of our own and what we choose to do with our money is our own business. Contrary to what some may think, we didn't sit around cyber-altars chanting about how evil all black men are or whatever some folks think. We discussed dbr men of all types when it came up. But we also networked, shared life experiences, encouraged each other to travel & shared travel experiences....I even discovered Bikram Yoga (thanks Delish !) I'm truly sorry if other members didn't have the same experience for whatever reason.
Some people may challenge my take about Gen II because so much has been written/said about "The Mammy Chronicles." To that I have to say, the Chronicles were never meant to demean anyone with a weight problem. It has always been my understanding that the Chronicles were meant to be a caricature of the behaviors that destroy the lives of some black women. For example, doing everything for everybody else except herself, never accepting help....essentially being a "mule" for the world. That is my honest belief of the intent behind them. The author can correct me if I'm wrong, but I remember the Chronicles started during a time when everyone was so sick and tired of hearing about black woman and child after another being murdered or raped and out of the author's mind came a way to cope with that. We were able to stop and laugh at the utter ridiculousness to keep from screaming. That is how the Chronicles were "born."
Now about the whole spying issue. I can only speak for myself, but it is my perception that the entire situation was so explosive because some felt their privacy had been invaded because Gen II was a "protected" community. In hindsight, I think emotions got in the way and Miriam was unfairly labeled a "spy" and for that I offer her my own personal apology.
I like my life off-line to mirror my life on-line: that's drama free. The notion that there are "blog wars" is just too stupid to comprehend anymore in light of the state of our nation...with the war and the economy, etc. However, people will do what they will do. For me, I have closed this ugly chapter in blog-land with this post and I'm moving on to more important things. After all, I have weeks and weeks of hotness pics to find.
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