Quantum has left a new comment on your post "Why Are BW So Afraid of Using Their Skin Privilege...":
I'm a SWM, and I'd like to add something here. I've ALWAYS loved darker skin, a thick, round bootie, and thicker lips, voluptuousness, etc. It's some of the things that have always drawn me to black women. Black women to me, are the sexiest women on the planet, and it has nothing do with experimentation or any of that silly nonsense that we WM always get accused of simply because we like whom we like.
I could never understand why BW would get uncomfortable and sometimes just plain turned off by that! It would make me think, "What's wrong with this person? Would you prefer I find you UNattractive? Or ugly? What's your hold up? And it is YOUR hold up." I'm just being honest here. It was incredibly frustrating. All I wanted to do was love a BW, but they wouldn't let me because I found their features attractive. It just made absolutely no sense! And not that the following doesn't carry any importance, but too many people make WAY too big of a deal over culture and whatever else, and so they don't relax and just be themselves and let others appreciate them. Let us WM appreciate you!!! So many BW have really missed out on great guys simply because they couldn't handle the fact that we WM find you so incredibly beautiful. Of course we want sex with you - God made us sexual beings. Did we cease being males and did you BW cease wanting sex because we find you incredible? If it's a fetish, then it's a permanent one. Would you prefer my desire for you would wane like the ocean tide? I would think not! I want a BW to desire me physically and sexually as much as I desire her! And permanently so. It's not just about body and sex, but that's a big part of it - just as important as the emotions, the mind, the spirit and the chemistry found in those areas.
I will never apologize (nor should I) for desiring big full lips, a big bootie, thick legs, round hips, a busty chest, or brown skin. I love curves and voluptuousness and sexy, brown skin. What else can I say about that? It's what I like and love. It's what I prefer, it's what I desire deep down. I always have. It's what God Almighty put inside of me to want. It's part of who I am. And if a BW would let a WM like me be a man, have my sexual desires, share them with her, and often, and let me love her and build a life with her, and if she'd do the same with me, then we could build the kind of life and marriage (one day), and our relationship would not only be hot and passionate, but it would serve as an example to others about the way God intended man and woman to love and relate to each other - on all levels. We could build a family and live our lives which is what it all ultimately comes down to. I mean, isn't that what any healthy human being wants, male or female, bottom line?
Sex and physical attraction are important, and I want both to be red hot, just like any BW would want. But it's only a part of me - not all of me. Let me be a man. Let me be attracted to you. Let me share it with you. If I can't show you because it's not the right time or place to, then I at least need to talk about it and I need you to hear me, and understand, and value how I beautiful and sexy I find you to be. Bottom line, I just want to love a woman and have her love me back the same - and my attraction to you (my "fetish" for you, or whatever you may want to call it), is permanent, and it's part of how I share and show my love.
I don't think BW truly understand how deep down into a man's (and in this case, a WM's) soul this desire for you goes. So many of you simply do NOT understand. After awhile, the frustration of not being released to share something that resides so deep down builds up to the point that it really hurts - it begins to really wound the heart. And we end up with people on both sides who don't feel appreciated, are frustrated, and walk away missing out and not sharing love. It's ridiculous - no wonder people in society are so miserable. All we're trying to do is love each other and we either don't know how to accept it, or we're blocked from sharing it. It's like we're bumbling around in the dark. It doesn't mean you have to get involved with everyone you meet, but don't turn away someone who appreciates you.
I've always considered myself strong, but all this is very difficult for a man like me to share. I'm being as honest and open as I know how to be. And I'm risking sharing this for your benefit so you women have the opportunity to learn. Not many men will share this openly with you. The internet affords me a bit of anonymity, so I can release myself a bit easier to be open.
Some of you may not know how to respond to this honesty; some of you may find it shocking that some of us men actually feel beyond sex. Well, we do. So if you're uncomfortable with my words, give it time, and you'll see I'm just human too.
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