Success Stories from The Asian Woman Files

Ok, the title of my post is in jest, but not by much. Another smart Asian woman is officially engaged to a high-profile man. James Gandolfini and Deborah Lin are heading down the aisle.

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We as bw have got to get smarter about how we seek out mates. You can't tell me that there wasn't ONE bw in the entertainment business who was in James Gandolfini's circle and couldn't have landed him if she gave it a shot. Come on now. Hello, Gabrielle Union, Kerry Washington, Tracey Edmonds ( I mean really Tracey, Eddie Murphy..uhmmm..no) --you get the picture. I suspect these ladies are in the "nothing but a bm camp" smh.

Some of us may look at James and see that he is a big guy without a "male model body" and he's *gasp* bald. My response would be "and."..lol. I happen to think the man is sexy. I love his big hands, the bedroom eyes and the walk...hotness to me. I could care less that he's chunky. I bet you Deborah Lin couldn't care less either....lol. I'm sure Ms. Lin had other criteria in mind when she accepted Jame's proposal.

Asian women are a lot smarter than us when it comes to making mating decisions based on what is best for them and their futures. I'm sure "pretty boy" with a cool "swagger" factored NO WHERE on that list. I'm also sure, Ms. Lin couldn't give two flying figs what anyone else thinks about her man's looks either. That's something we bw have GOT to let go of. We spend way too much time trying to "represent" when it comes to the man we choose. We often let "fine" substitute for QUALITY.

I challenge bw to go out to lunch alone at a local spot where the "business types" head for a bite to eat. Just sit there and observe everyone while you eat. Take note of the ww and aw who might be there meeting husbands or boyfriends for lunch. Do these women (in their committed relationships) all have "pretty boys" or do they have regular guys ? Really pay attention...I did this and quickly realized that I was (stupidly) discounting a lot of QUALITY men. smh at myself.

Free your mind and mate smarter in 2008.